Outsourcing Myself

My husband and I have found ourselves, due to all sorts of circumstances, in a daily panic-inducing financial crisis.  He makes a wonderful salary but almost 1/3 of it is being applied to child support (which of course he is more than willing to pay) and alimony (umm…not so much).   I have taken, because of my passion in my work, a 50% paycut from where I used to be in fairly cushy jobs.   I don’t regret that decision for a second.

We’re not unique in the living paycheck to paycheck way of life but we have often found ourselves in the somewhat scary challenge of living, for example,  on $25 for 4 days.  We pride ourselves on somehow being able to do that without ending up in the fetal position.   You’d be amazed at how delicious dollar store burritos are.

We look at things we can possibly sell for quick cash—outmoded cell phones for example—but looking around your home and trying to isolate things that might be of value is terribly depressing.

When I was laid-off from my last job and not yet employed by my current job (only 15-hrs a week), I was collecting unemployment and looking for work to supplement my weekly benefits check.  I networked a bit and have friends who stepped up to the plate for all sorts of things from writing website copy for her roofing company to personal ads.  I found three tutoring jobs through another site which has been sporadic, but ongoing.

In the past few years there have been a slew of websites, Task Rabbit, Task Mogul and even craigslist where one can “outsource” themselves.   You post your skills and talents,   find an approachable, photshopped picture and brag about yourself to no end.   Through a canned video interview you use big words while wearing a big smile.    After that you wait to see if you’re approved and deemed worthy of being on these sites. 

I have a friend who has an incredible and useful skill.  He used to work at IKEA and knows, without giving up and throwing the pieces of couches and cribs against a wall, how to assemble anything (it helps that he’s Swedish too).   People post their needs in areas such as this, and qualified people “bid” on the job.  You can see what other people think they have to offer and wait for the person to decide who they will hire. 

In my case, I vie for certain writing jobs.  I can’t clean a house to save my life (a very popular need), I don’t have the money to lay out when people need a personal shopper to pick up stuff at Target, so I stick to what I’m good at.  I was just hired for my very first “task” in response to a posting that said:  “Help With Heartfelt Writing for A Special Event, 2-3 minutes in length.”  I pounced on this, gushing about my experience writing presentations at all sorts of heartstring tugging non-profit events. 

You gush publicly where you see other people gushing in equally hyperbolic self-promoting language.  The poster revealed that the job was writing her wedding vows.  Within seconds I sent her a link to my OWN vows that I had posted on my personal blog two years ago.  It sealed the deal.

At first I found it odd that someone would ask a stranger to do this, but when we chatted I learned that she felt she couldn’t compete with her English Professor husband.  She is an incredibly lovely woman and I am honored that she is entrusting me to do this for her.  For $25.

Then there’s craigslist.   I start every day by looking at a section called “gigs” and what is posted under “writing.”  They range from the terribly absurd to the somewhat practical.  I get the sense that there are people who are up all night, hitting the refresh button, to be the first person to apply.  By the time I’m awake I’m sure that the posters have been inundated with e-mails from people who will accept a penny a word for daily thousand word blurbs on farming equipment or flooring.  When certain people are looking for writers with a sense of humor I will respond with subject lines like “I’m the funniest person I know!”   When others need someone who knows about shopping and retail, for example, I might say, “Noone loves retail more than I!”

I hate the sense of desperation in my responses.  I feel like it somehow cheapens me and my self-worth.  The truth is, though, is that I’m not unique in this current economy.  People are clamoring for those pennies a word and the $10 tasks that don’t even cover the cost of the gas involved.  I recently hired my first task rabbit to clean my bathrooms and kitchen to surprise my husband for his birthday.  We chatted a bit and she told me of the many tasks she has done for people like searching every Apple Store when the latest iphones came out, waiting in lines for hours, all for $100.  Me, I would have shot somebody if I had to do that.  For $40 she cleaned my toilets and my bathtub.  In her off hours, she plays violin in a symphony orchestra.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel for my husband and me.  It’s a nice light, and one that will alleviate all of this stress.  It’s many months away, but knowing its coming, that we won’t have to go through that contact list in our heads of who we can borrow money from or banks who might extend our credit lines, has made us look forward to the possibility of fulfilling dreams as simple as replacing our dvd player that has been broken for months to being able to buy a house.  We know it will happen and that we’ll look back and share stories with our grandkids, like our Depression-era grandparents did with us, on how you learn to make do with the things you have.  We’ll spew platitudes like “Thank God we had our health,” and “At least we had a roof over our heads.”  I absolutely know that we are lucky people and we are indeed grateful for everything we do have.  It’s a rough patch, but together, we will get through it.